4 Argentinia! 17 april 2007

Last week and step by step I crossed the borders of Argentinia. And I enjoy the usual speed by which I always regain my natural powers, my calmness and my broad vision on life, work and the ever changing world. The energyreservoirs are filling day by day. And my common meditative mood spreads its wings.
I am on holiday of course, my type of holiday, full of mental action, though not too heavily workrelated yet. It belongs to me that when the rocks are rolling and the teams I am engaged with are on their own move, I retract for a while to replenish my vitality. So thats why I am in the House on the Lake. And just like other times I need and needed the first days to deal with the residue pains that linger under my tiredness.
Normally, like everybody else, in my everyday life I easily deal with the moments of pain and grief and frustration. I am a positive man. But at the way I live- at full speed, happily and heavily engaged- every day some poisonous drups of pain secretely stay behind and start to fill the bucket, freeze and cristallize to lumps of ice.
I know myself and I know the two main lumps of ice that gradually more every day unconsciously- but not always that- start piercing my heart and distract me from my usual strength, my calmness, my visionnary outlook on myself and the world: Coldness and the Syrenes, meaning the attractions, the ideas, the encounters- highly valuable, but at the price of losing My Self- If am not careful- and I am.
Princess and Acrobat are not real living persons. They are just projections of my need for warmth and my longing to be touched by new experiences. I gave Princess and Acrobat a voice, to keep the more easily in sight.
And I won them for me, not by fighting them, but looking them in the face, so long that the sadness and the anger exchanged for just the stabs of pain. It took some time, it always does, but in that peaceful confrontation the feelings connected backed off slowly, definitely till I could get on the landing stage for my House, feeling how the sun took possession of me, warmed me and how I felt one with the silvery ripples on the Lake. And as for the Acrobat: I sublimized this glorious experience by writing a short short story, that I will soon make public on this log. Its called Li Xiao the fluteplayer.
And of course I slept, good and long. And did the small things: buying those tomatoes(first class from israel), three pies of chocory, icebergsalads. Started to cook my own simple meals supplement by the healtsome sackets delivered by The Highpriest of Weightcontrol.
Thinking about the things Camus told me the first night in the House, I must happily conclude: I am losing my head.
I phoned Tonio. For the four jobs in Beijijng Office he got 2000 apllicants. Management Team. a leading dutch Management magazine just published a very very good intervieuw with Anne on the work of the Schouten&Nelissen Group. Beautiful picture too.
Slowly enter into my brain the first ideas related to the further improvement of Schouten&Nelissen Group and the next steps in China. But I put an halt to it for the moment.